Waiting is a calculated move, use it wisely

My psychologist told me that I have an addiction to anxiety.

When he uttered those words everything changed. I immediately acknowledged that he was absolutely correct. It was like the curtains had been opened in a pitch black room of my mind. I used to love being anxious. I used to thrive on the feeling that anxiety brings with it, on the release of endorphins and adrenaline that helps me focus when there is anxiety afoot. For a long time I struggled to exist and be a functioning person without being anxious.

Then in my next session, he dropped another mind-bomb that shattered my understanding of myself;

Waiting is an action.

This appears to be a very simple statement in and of itself but if you combine my addiction to anxiety with my inability to wait for anything to happen you are left in a puddle of anger and frustration. I found myself creating things to be anxious about, complain about and become irate about.

I was a wreck.

He went on to explain that making plans is good and that executing plans is also good. It was my inability to wait for the plan to work that was destroying any real progress in my life. I am an impatient person by nature so it’s not shock to me that waiting is a skill that I needed to refine but before…